How To Have A Positive Mindset
By Susan Leigh
Some people think that looking good is about being perfectly groomed, wearing the latest fashions and appearing as if you’ve just stepped from the pages of a fabulous magazine. But there are many people who fulfill none of those criteria, who may even look a little wild, quirky and disheveled at times and yet something about them means they always looks great.
What does it take to look great, what is the best way to look good each day?
– Top of many people’s attractive list is a ready smile and a cheery disposition. Someone who is warm, friendly and enjoys life generates an inner glow and radiance that lights up everything and everyone about them.
– Be someone who’s prepared to say yes, who’s enthusiastic, joins in and is willing to have a go. People who grab opportunities will most times look good because that mindset generates engagement and a readiness to live life to the full. Attractive people often have a genuine interest in life and what it brings.
– Start to develop good habits and maintain a positive mindset by focusing on the good things that happen each day, even the small things like a stranger’s smile, a compliment, a thoughtful gesture, the view from your window. When you start to treasure the good in life the ensuing happier outlook will help you look better each day.
– Learn not to take things personally. Someone else’s bad mood or unwarranted outburst may be because they have a situation of their own that needs to be dealt with. Reflect on what’s happened, try to stand back from it a little and decide how to respond. When you detach yourself you can determine how to next proceed, as well as take care of how you want to feel afterwards.
– Look after yourself. Good health is a significant factor in looking good. Exercise regularly and follow a healthy regimen, with breaks for good food and plenty of water. The importance of sleep is often underestimated, but respect that quality sleep is a key part of processing the day’s activities. We often feel better, have a more positive view of life when we’ve ‘slept on it’. Many people work long hours and hope to catch up on their sleep at weekends or holiday times but try to introduce good habits; switch off your technology and commit to a couple of hours relaxation before bed. Wind down, sleep well and invest in looking good each day.
– Be gentle with yourself. Forgive yourself your shortcomings and mistakes. Yes, there may be issues and situations that need to be dealt with, things that are messy, that cause stress. Try to deal with them quickly; it’s usually less stressful than was envisaged. Value constructive criticism. Decide if there’s a validity to what’s been said, a learning point you could benefit from. Treat yourself with the same compassion you would someone else, then give yourself credit for your gentler approach.
– Don’t underestimate the role of professional help in dealing with your ‘demons’, negative patterns of behaviour or any issues you may have. Utilise a good counsellor or hypnotherapist and support yourself in becoming stronger and more confident. Reacting badly to stress, situations and other people can become a habit and sometimes we need help to change that and learn to cope better.
– Accept help. Let friends, family or colleagues provide support and be gracious about their ideas and input. You may even need to ask for help at times, suggest things that you need to make your life easier, especially if you’ve always been independent. But mutual support can improve relationships, generate new ideas and forge important bonds and connections. Communicate regularly and invest time and attention in your special relationships. Welcome the closeness and feel part of team you.
– Some people find that they’re always in a rush in the mornings. They have so much to cram into the first hour of each day that they’re already frazzled and out of sorts by the time they arrive at work. Going to better earlier may allow you to get up earlier, with time to start the day well. You could do some stretching, 30 minutes of yoga, maybe get off the bus a stop earlier and walk part of the way. Then you can take time and have a drink, maybe some breakfast and start the day with a more relaxed, positive frame of mind, looking better as a consequence.
– Reflect on how your appearance, the impression you give, the image you portray. Many of us adopt an everyday ‘uniform’ in order to dress quickly, fit in with our colleagues and go about our lives. We may shop intermittently for new items but answer honestly, if you really looked at yourself would you say ‘wow, not bad’ or ‘could maybe do with a make over’! Try to impartially assess your style. Perhaps take a selfie. Are you a little dated, do you need to freshen your image or amend your look to suit your present lifestyle better? Makeup can be a factor too; many women wear the same look for years, yet most department stores employ makeup consultants who are only too happy to provide advice on updating your image. Visit a different hairdresser or barber and benefit from being styled by a fresh pair of eyes.
– Schedule in some fun. Some times of the year can seem more gloomy than others. If you’re short of cash, on your own or overwhelmed with commitments there can seem to be little opportunity for fun anytime soon. Plan a get together, maybe once every few weeks or so, where you invite friends, neighbours, colleagues around for a catch up. It could be a games evening with cards or football, a bite of supper where everyone brings a bottle or dish or even a local concert or dance. Money doesn’t need to be a major part of fun. Having people round for a coffee or going for a walk together can help you feel more positive, sociable and inject some sociability into your life. And having something in your diary to look forward to can really lift your spirits.
– Do things that make you feel happy. Even if you’ve only a little free time, try to ensure that you find a corner in your day where you read a book or enjoy a special hobby or interest. Maybe go to bed a little earlier and spend the time listening to music or find a stimulating evening class. When you find time for things that make you feel happy you’ll find that you look better as a consequence.
Looking good comes not just from being clean, tidy and well-groomed. It’s also important to invest time and attention in our mental and emotional well being also.
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